The Writing Bug

-
Sometimes I feel this incredible urge to write. I may have written about this before. But it's back. I feel like I have all these ideas for amazing stories floating around in my head, but I can't seem to get them out.

I've never been much of a prose writer. I could BS an essay like nothing in college, but a short story? That was hell.

I used to write poetry. In high school it probably averaged around a poem every other day. Or more. But it was childish poetry. It was about the emotions a high schooler feels. My poetry started to mature in college. I could pump out a sonnet at breakfast for a friend's assignment that morning. But my poetry was still based on emotion. Usually darker emotions. Pain, sadness, loneliness. Those were my main inspirations.

Then I met someone. I fell in love with him. I was happy with him. I still am happy with him. The pain and loneliness went away. No more inspiration. I have tried to write happy poems, but  they seem to fail me. I'm not very good at happy. I'm too dark and cynical to do happy.

But dark and cynical aren't as easy as they used to be, either. I haven't even ranted about stupidity over at Tough Crackers is quite a while.

So how do I get rid of this writing bug? Blogging doesn't really cut it. How do I use my dark humor and cynicism to vent my creative needs? Dark cynical poetry? seems like a bit of an oxymoron, but I suppose I can try. Again. 

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

working on it

-
so since i last posted, i've had some level of migraine pain every day. migraines make me depressed, and i'm pretty sure depression gives me migraines. So i've set myself somewhat of a schedule, a routine for working out. Tuesday, thursday and Saturday are crossfit. Wednesdays are training runs, whether i do an easy run, intervals, whatever. Fridays are cardio of whatever variety I can do. Sundays are long runs, which right now is about 3 miles. Mondays are rest, which can include yoga and dog walking. it felt good to get to workout today, but i had to take it slow and scale back. i'll try to get out and run tomorrow morning. so that's my goal this week, to workout every day till Monday. and to take my meds every day because i often forget, especially when i'm migrainy or depressed, which is what these meds are supposed to fucking help. it's what misty would call the merry-go-round of knives. if i can get into a routine and schedule, i think it will
Read more

because I can

-
I've decided to reboot this blog as a therapeutic space for myself. Not sharing on social media or anything, just sharing randomly on teh inter webs. because, depression. mild anxiety, but mostly depression. and maybe someone else will stumble onto this and not feel quite so alone. I'm still not super comfortable talking about my depression on social media. I'm going to talk about it here. I'm going to let it all out and maybe even find some answers. background: diagnosed with dysthymia after reaching my lowest point. currently on bupropion and sertraline. I belong to a Crossfit box and try to attend 3 days a week. OH yeah, i also have chronic migraines. my pain levels stay low but i get all the symptoms under the sun for days on end. strength training has become my go-to exercise because even on migraine days I do manage some light weights. I used to run, and i loved running. in my low depression I didn't run and it's much harder for me now. I got into
Read more

In Need of Advice

-
Most of my local girlfriends follow me here, so I can ask for advice. I'm a messy person. I always have been. J knew this when we started dating. He knew it when we moved in, when we got engaged, when we got married. He still isn't used to it, and eventually we argue a little about the state of the house. I've never been very organized. I'm a stacker. I like to make stacks and piles, and then leave them there. Fortunately, I'm not a afraid of germs or dirt. Or maybe that's unfortunately, since it would probably help me keep a cleaner house. I see my friends' houses and don't know how they do it. Especially the ones with kids. How do you keep your counter so clean? How do you keep things put away? Another part of the problem is that I don't like cleaning. I mean, sometimes I actually say, "Oh, let's do some dishes. That sounds like the thing to do now." Sometimes. Other times I look at my dirty dishes and want to just throw them
Read more